There are some sick puppies out there, I should know I schooled them. But this guy turns it into an art form - he likes to draw sketches of real life murders and muggings, like a Walt Disney who grew up reading James Ellroy.

They're technically good drawings, but damn are they sinister, but then I suppose murder is a pretty sinister act; not exactly the work of Saints now is it? Apart from St. Murder himself, their patron saint.

There's something undeniable creepy about looking at his drawings, and the fact that they're drawn in a comic book style adds to this, as does the fact that they are drawn as if the image was a photo of the event, taken just before the act takes place. Maybe he perpetrated all the crimes he's drawn, so that's why he makes it look so realistic, or maybe he just uses his artistic skill to imagine it.

Artists, they're a crazy bunch.

I thought No. 1 was going to be 'Become An Actor'. Hilarious aye, but actors work real hard, so stop laughing! Nah they don't really, they just sit about in their trailers jacking off over the fruit bowl, then occasionally venturing outside on set, farting, which is then recorded, edited, a fart noise is added, sound track is added (more fart noises), the fart cloud is digitally enhanced using lasers fired from Uranus, then it's shown to a test audience who demand a happier ending where the fart noise becomes a trombone-like sound. So it's re-edited, the sound changed and then it's ready.

Then it's shown to some very important critics, without whom the Earth would not revolve around the Sun, who applaud the actor's skill in showing the depth and exact squelchy sound of someone passing wind. It's then shown in countries the world over, its very existence halts global warming, the meltdown of the economy and provides the whole world with clean water - then, finally, deservingly, they get an Oscar.

That's fact, I should know, as I once directed Gielgud on stage as Hamlet's sweat glands, it's was spectacular!

Anyway, like I said acting's not on the list, but plenty of other great career paths are. So go check it out and find out how to get rich, without having to work, just like an actor!